Thursday, March 12, 2020

Disneyland -- Before All Hell Breaks Loose

Well, we cut that one close.
OK, so Laura joined me on this adventure, and she doesn't have Magic Mornings, so we just figured on hitting the parking garage at 7:00 and being inside the park by 8:00.
And we hit it pretty exactly. She picked me up at 7:00 and it took something like 8 whole minutes to get to the parking garage. Got parked, got through security, got on the tram -- all with reasonable speed.
And then we saw the lines outside the park. They seemed pretty freakin' long, but two things made this not as bad as it seemed. First, half the lines were taken up by Magic Mornings, so there were really only half the lines open for regular admission. And, second, the lines weren't open yet at all. So this was more of a logjam than a moving line. Once they opened up (ballpark 7:30) the lines moved quickly and we got in. Had about 20 minutes to link up our tickets (on both our apps) and find a nice corner with a good signal.
We'd done our research and read everything about how to best get a boarding group and fast, and although we got a little nervous counting down the seconds to rope drop, it was actually pretty straightfoward and the cheerful "Group 37" showed up on my screen. We cheered. We high-fived, but switched to a fist bump (because Corona). People next to us got 40-something, they were excited, too. We heard the people cheer down Main Street as everyone got the good news.
Three comments here: (1) Yes, we cheered a bit faster than everyone else. I'd like to say we're just that good, but we got lucky. (2) I'm pretty sure EVERYONE who was trying for a boarding group got one. At least, everyone who was trying then. It was probably a good half hour (or so) when Laura checked the app again and backup boarding groups were still available. (3) Not everyone was trying. This puzzled me, as I could not believe anyone in their right mind would get up that early to be in Disneyland at opening without having this as, y'know, a REASON, but whatever, less competition. (Still, despite all the publicity around this, there are still people who don't know you need to do this to get a boarding group.)
Here's what we did not know: They don't start boarding. We keep checking the app and the app keeps saying "Now Boarding" but listing no groups. We take a breath and ride Big Thunder -- we know it's going to rain soon so figure we'll get in an outdoor ride while we can. We go back to Galaxy's Edge and learn that NOT opening Rise on time is more common than opening on time. The helpful cast member to whom we spoke said they'd actually only managed to open with the park twice, so they usually aim for the first hour ... and if that doesn't work, the second.
We realized that, despite our relatively low boarding group, this could take some time. We didn't manage a cantina reservation, but thought we'd ask the nice cast member at the queue. She let us in, no problem. We got seated at a table. And had food! (They don't have a lot of breakfast options -- two, actually -- but the oaty yogurt thing was affirmatively tasty.) It had commenced raining right as we got to Oga's -- despite the weather app saying it wouldn't rain until 1:00, it had started sprinkling around 9:00 and never really let up.
By 9:45, Rise was still not open. (That might be a lie. We later learned it had opened briefly for a few boarding groups, but then went down again.)
The app tells us the wait at Astro Blasters is 20 minutes, so we start to walk over to it. By the time we get there, the wait is 40 minutes, and Rise is back up, calling boarding groups 11-21.
40 minutes? The hell. We figure we'll just kill time and avoid the rain in that Star Wars Thing That's Where America Sings Used To Be. We walk over. It doesn't open until 11:00.
Well shit, now what? Rise is adding Boarding Groups every few minutes and they're safely in the 20s. Maybe we get a FastPass for something and ride it after Rise? We go over to those Tomorrowland FP machines (which are totally new to me) and we're about to get Space Mountain passes (for a return time after 1:00) when I notice the Astro Blasters FPs have a return time at 10:10.
It's 10:00 now. It's a 40 minute wait in the stand by line, but 10 minutes on Fast Pass.
I am puzzled by this. Either everyone in that line already has a FP for something else or ... they don't know how FPs work. (Must be the same people who were in there at park opening but not trying for a Rise boarding group. Oooookay.) We get the FPs and ride Astro Blasters; we get out in perfect time to walk back to Galaxy's Edge at hit Rise just as they're adding 37 to the board.
N.B. Walking back to Rise was the first and only time we saw anyone wearing a surgical mask in the park.
We join the queue. There's a family behind us, little blond-headed kid. In the line, you go through caves. There's a little niche at about floor level; animal noises are coming out of it. The kid, excited, thinks there's bats in there. (There are no bats in there.) The parents tell him there are no bats in there. Laura bends down to look in the niche; there's definitely animal sounds (intentionally provided by Disney) coming out of it. She asks the kid what he thinks could be making the noises. Kid is happy (and returns to the "bats" theory). PLAY WITH YOUR KIDS, PEOPLE; you're in fucking Disneyland!
We ride the ride. No blow-by-blow here (largely because it's available from other sources; also because I wanted to be completely unspoiled on it, so, yeah). Impressions: I understand why it takes so long to reset it when it goes down. Holy kittens, there are a lot of moving parts in that thing! As a physical ride, it's probably a 5 out of 10; as a piece of integrated storytelling, it's off the freakin' chart. It's impressive in scale; most of the cast members with which we interacted were super into their parts (one wasn't -- send a note to Quality Control); and ... OK, let me put it like this: I was never ACTUALLY in the story to the extent of believing I was a genuine member of the Resistance on this particular mission; but they did such a phenomenal job of creating the mood, I DID FEEL like it would be super duper wrong to take out my phone and start snapping selfies there. (And No Sense Of Humor dude would probably cut me down where I stood.) And the attention to detail was so rich, I can totally see riding it again just for all the stuff I missed.
We get out and it's still raining. A lot. The wait time for Smugglers Run is something like 40 minutes which does not feel acceptable, so we Single Rider that thing and end up together anyway.
Question: So, the last time I went, they were still handing out the color-cards with your crew and your position. This time, they just said, "You're the Purple Crew" and orally assigned parts. Dude said, "It's something new we're trying." My question: Is this "something new we're trying" or is this "given Coronavirus concerns, we're not going to hand you a card someone else breathed all over"?
We get out around noon and consider options. It is now raining to the point that our "water resistant" jackets are demonstrating that "water resistant" is not "waterproof."

We consider hopping over to California Adventure and riding Guardians (we both LOVE that one), but the wait time is 75 minutes and quite a bit of that is uncovered.
Having accomplished our mission to ride Rise, and feeling quite soggy, we decide discretion is the better part of valor and maybe it's time to get the hell out. We make a quick shopping stop at Emporium on the way out and THERE look at our phones and learn that the Governor is strongly suggesting Californians cancel all gatherings of over 250 people, which will likely result in the park closing. We knew we were cutting things close, but had no idea it was THAT close. By the time I got home, Disney had announced the park was closing Saturday.
We had decided to go knowing very well that this might be not only our last chance to hit the parks for a while, but our last Outing Of Normalcy before life moved to quasi-quarantine. In between that decision and now: hockey game I had tickets for Saturday - not happening; friend's birthday party Saturday night - not happening; Dodger opening day I had tickets for - not happening; Vegas trip in April - not happening. If this WAS my last outing of normalcy for the foreseeable future, I'm glad to have spent it fighting with the Resistance.

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