Wednesday, April 6, 2005

Memo to the World re: last night's American Idol

To:  World

From:  NZforMe

Re:  Broadway

No.  That isn't what showtunes are supposed to sound like.

Honestly, those performances were cringe-worthy.  Can't believe how all three judges (and most of America) thinks Bo turned in a good performance last night.  The man forgot the words to the song!  If he'd started muttering lines halfway through an Eric Clapton hit, everyone would pound him for it -- but, somehow, since it's "just a showtune," he gets a free pass.  My butt.  Learn the words before you pick up the mic.

And someone should send Nadia to see "Oliver," so she has some idea what "As Long As He Needs Me" is about.  She seems to think it's about standing by your man no matter what -- and proudly tells us that she herself has been in a similar relationship.  Um, Nadia -- the character is a prostitute in an abusive relationship.  You been there?

And sweet, clueless Carrie, who tells us that Broadway songs don't come in any genre, like country.  Clearly "Annie, Get Your Gun" must be full of bland torch songs like everything else on Broadway.  Silly me.  Amazing that Reba McIntyre did such a good job starring in it.

None of this matters, though.  Enough contestants (Scott, for instance) sang so badly even an America totally unfamiliar with Broadway will surely notice.

What kills me, though, are the random message board comments I've been reading that say, "What do you expect?  The songs were lame.  Nobody can sing them well."  Um, no.  The material was fine -- with several beautiful, touching songs that, in the right hands, can move you to tears.  The problem is a group of singers with no clue how to do anything other than plant themselves center stage and try to wring the biggest notes out of the material.  That ain't singing.

 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

My goodness! Someone I know is becoming a curmudgeon!

Welcome to my world, dahlink...

wil

Anonymous said...

I agree that most of the show probably scared America away from musicals.  The one bright spot for me though, was Anwar Robinson's "If Ever I would Leave You" from Camelot.  Its one of my favorite musicals, and I thought he did the song very well.