The One About The Toothpaste

OK, when I travel, I have a pre-packed "bathroom bag."

This originally started because I kept forgetting to pack necessary things (frequently anti-perspirant, for some reason).  So I keep a bag pre-packed with everything I will or may need when travelling.  When I get home, I refill the shampoo, conditioner, hair gel, (... Q-Tips, band-aids, cold remedies... whatever I've used), replace the razor, and I'm good to go the next time I have a trip.  Besides, you never know when you might have to leave the country in a hurry.

Shortly after returning from my Boston/Canada/New York jaunt, I had a quick trip to Arizona to see my parents.  Knowing that this trip was on my horizon, I didn't bother refilling the bathroom bag, because I figured there were enough leftover supplies to get me through 3 days in Scottsdale.

Thus, it wasn't till I was in the guest bathroom at my parents' place that I realized I'd left my travel toothbrush and toothpaste in New York.  I had the toothbrush container, but there was no toothbrush actually in it.

My parents were already asleep.  I started randomly opening drawers, trying to find some emergency toothbrush and toothpaste.  And there it was:  Emergency toothbrush and toothpaste.  A cheapie toothbrush and a small sample tube of Rembrandt.  Took me forever to open the little seals on the plastic box.  That adhesive wasn't giving up easily.  But I finally got in.  Unscrewed the cap on the toothpaste.  Aimed it at the toothbrush.  Squeezed.

Nothing.

I look into the tube to make sure there isn't some sort of protective seal I have to pierce.  Nope.  I can see toothpaste in there.  I squeeze again.

Still nothing.  It's like the toothpaste is a brick.  It isn't going anywhere.

I look at the expiration date on the end of the tube:  2000.

Continue poking in the drawer.  Finally find some Colgate that will actually come out of the tube.  Vintage 2003.