The thing is...

First things first -- Wil comments on my valet story below, suggesting that maybe the dude just ignored me because he thought I was going to take my bag out of the trunk and thereby deprive him of a tip.  Nope.  He had deserted me long before I took the bag out.  And, in fact, when I had not yet taken it out, the other valet guys were standing a few feet away chatting, and not one of them made a move toward me to help with the bag -- until the one of them asked if I needed help, and he seemed sorta put out by even having to ask.  Like I was taking him away from his morning coffee by, y'know, needing a valet.

Now, on to more recent events.

I'm 39.

Did I mention I'm 39?

OK.  I don't want to make a big deal out of this (and I'm sure my mom will read this and think this is all revealing and stuff, when it really isn't) -- but here's the thing.  I know the wedding is all about the bride, and seeing as I'm the groom's cousin she doesn't even know who the hell I am or have any reason to have the slightest thought about my feelings.  That said -- it is awkward enough being the only unmarried person sitting at the "cousins table," -- is it really necessary for the wedding bandleader to threaten to individually call me up by name to stand with the other six single women in the room (all of whom were bridesmaids, and the bride's friends, and probably half my age) for the bouquet toss? 

I mean seriously.  At this point in my life, either I'm single by choice, so respect it; or I'm single not by choice, in which case I don't really need my singlehood to be pointed out in the middle of someone else's wedding.  (As it happens, it's a little bit of both.  But still.)  It's all well and good to do that with a bunch of giggling 20-somethings who are friends of the bride.  It's even ok to just generally call the single females up and leave it to us whether we want to participate in this particular ritual.  But to actually try to humiliate the 39-year-old into participating?

Bite me.