Homework: A Beer With...

For this week's homework, John Scalzi asks:

Weekend Assignment #13: Tell the class which of the Founding Fathers you'd want to hang out and have a beer with and why.

Well, in the spirit of the obvious, I'd have to with Samuel Adams.  You know, because of the whole brewery thing.  I mean, if I've gotta have a beer with a patriot, I might as well go with someone who knows his hops.  And, according to that link right there, he "avoided the fashion of the day, a powdered wig," which I'd have to say is something I consider a plus in my barbecue companions.  And besides (despite the whole lack of environmental consciousness), I give the guy points for the whole Boston Tea Party thing.  I'm lovin' those creative protests.

We here overlook the fact that I'm not, in actuality, a beer drinker.  (Isn't that bizarre?  I have no problem suspending disbelief enough to think I could hang out with a Founding Father, but I find it really hard imagining myself as a beer drinker.)  So I ask myself who I'd just like to hang out with.  And, y'know, being as I am a female of the species, I wouldn't mind an attractive companion...

Take a good look at these guys.  Go on.  Isn't like the room is overflowing with studmuffins now, is it?  They might be smart, they might be courageous, they might be extremely foresighted -- but what they're not is a bunch of guys I'd want to see in their speedos lounging around the pool on a hot summer's day.

Don't get me wrong.  I wouldn't turn down the opportunity to share an icy cold beverage with a Founding Father.  But I don't think it's because I think I'd really want to hang out with any of them for anything unrelated to their Founding Fatherhood.  So I'll just take me some random Founder everyone else is overlooking in favor of Jefferson and Franklin and all them other famous ones.  Come to think of it, while I have no real interest in having a beer with any of the guys, I think I'd be proud to buy any of them a brewski.