Thursday, April 8, 2004

Mariette

Yes, the stories of my new computer, decorating my home and (bonus) the near-continual saga of me injuring myself now collide in the story of Mariette, the computer that wouldn't leave.

So, Jack (new computer) arrives at the door courtesy the nice people at Dell.  This is, coincidentally, very similar to the way Mariette (old computer) arrived -- although it was courtesy the nice people at Gateway.  When Jack showed up, I boxed up Mariette in all her original Gateway packaging (which I'd saved in my storage bin in the garage) so I could store her in the aforementioned bin until I figure out a more permanent place for her to go.

The boxing up didn't go as well as I'd hoped.  While detaching Mariette's big-ass monitor from her CPU (that being under my desk), Mariette whacked me in the forehead, right over the eye.  (OK, OK, I whacked my head on Mariette while getting back up from under the desk -- but I'm certain it was intentional on her part.  I'd moved her monitor to the edge of the desk and she WILLFULLY refused to move when she saw I was popping my head back up.)  I iced my forehead and -- luckily -- it didn't bruise.  For two days.  Thereafter, the yellowish "healing" bruise appeared.  It's still a little tender -- and everyone at work thinks I accidentally wrote on my forehead with a highlighter.

So.  With that minor incident, I got Mariette in her boxes and I'm all ready to take them down to the garage.  (A process that involves carting them to the elevator and going down a couple flights.)  Problem.  All our condo has for the "carting big heavy boxes" task are a few shopping carts.  Both of Mariette's boxes are WAY too big to fit in the shopping carts.  Theoretically, I could maybe balance one across the top of a shopping cart, but it's unlikely I'll be able to lift it up there.  So I leave the boxes in the middle of my floor.

Today I think, "Aha!  Put them on the BOTTOM of the shopping cart."  You know, the place where the grocery store always puts the 12 pack of Coke or the 5 gallon jug of water (and then you forget they put it there and nearly drive off leaving your Coke or water in the shopping cart).  So I bring a cart up to my place.  I grab Mariette's monitor box (the smaller of the two) and shove it on the bottom of the cart.

I try, that is.  (Insert here much physical comedy with me shoving the monitor up the lip onto the bottom of the cart while the cart responds by sliding backwards across the floor.)  Mariette's monitor box is about 1/2 inch too tall.  It won't fit on the cart.

I cannot get Mariette out of my condo.

My current thoughts are: 
(1) invite some friends to come over for a "help me move my computer/I'll buy you pizza" party
(2) invite an unsuspecting big strong man over my place, act like I'm a weak female (won't require a whole lot of acting in this particular situation), and ask him to haul it downstairs for me
(3) take Mariette out of her boxes (risking various other head trauma), bring monitor and CPU down to garage in the shopping cart, rebox her on the floor of the garage, THEN put her in storage.

ARGH!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

I vote for #2.  Definitely.  

Mariette is quite pissed at you for replacing her.  I totally believe she whacked you one!  The old bird just doesn't know when to quit.

Anonymous said...

I go for:

(4) Push Mariette off deck or window ledge hoping the death will be ruled a suicide.

(5) Look in your phone book for PC recyclers that pick up. Pay the fee to get rid of her with out having to take her out of your pad.

Hope you had a great Seder.

Gordy

Anonymous said...

i might be tempted to go with #4 compliments of Gordy, except that Mariette has been a good friend all this time.  She's been there for you.  So she deserves a happy retirement & a warm send off.  (no, don't set her on fire)  LOL

Anonymous said...

donate her to the 1st person willing to come get her?? Describe her on Craig's List or something. If you're in a major city. Otherwise, just in the local paper. But that could take a few days. Maybe you've got it solved already. Seems to me when boxes are too heavy, I've been known to PUSH them across the floor ...

~ Karyn

Anonymous said...

You guys have been SO helpful.  I've been researching recyclers (which, oddly, aren't that easy to find in LA) and I think I may FINALLY have a lead on someone that will take Mariette off my hands without charging me more than her fair market value (which, btw, is $50) to get her the heck out of here.  (I'll have to call on Monday.)  Seriously.  I thought I'd found one, but the fine print on their site said they would charge me $115 to come out and pick it up.  But the OTHER thing I learned is that I CAN'T toss her.  At least, not the monitor.  $1000 fine, baby.  Tossing a monitor is an environmental no-no.  Anyway, I found a company whose website claims free pick-up -- and wiping out your hard drive for $5 -- compared to the others I've found it seems almost too good to be true -- but I certainly hope it is.  (True.  Not too good to be.)