The Facial

Andrea asks (more or less), apart from the ear thing, how'd the facial go?

Not bad really. I noticed a definite improvement in my skin. For starters, much less breakouts (although that might just be related to my stress levels at work). But, in general, my skin had been going out of control before I went in. I don't know WHAT was happening exactly, but the color started looking a little uneven (nothing as unusual as mysterious red patches or anything, but it just didn't look right) and whatever magic she did rebalanced me.

Them there was that uncomfortable moment at the end when she asked if I cleanse with an anti-oxidant. I clean my face with them Biore facial wipes. I've no idea what's in them. So I responded to her question with, "I'm gonna go with no." She then went into her stash of free samples and gave me a tiny bottle of something it looks like you need a prescription for. "Use this," she says. "It's a corrective step, so you'll want to do it after you cleanse and before you moisturize." I tried to do my very best impression of someone who moisturizes.

I've been thinking about that, actually. Do I really NEED to go out and use moisturizer? I mean, here's a woman who was allegedly diagnosing whatever is wrong with my skin (while figuring out exactly which facial masks are right for my own particular skin problems). Not to mention getting up close and personal with my pores. And she was under the impression that I used moisturizer. I figure if anyone's going to notice whether my skin is looking horribly unmoisturized, it's gonna be her. And yet, she didn't.

(And, and, and... y'ever notice on "Queer Eye" how Kyan always tells the guy what to use to wash his face after looking in his bathroom or just asking him point-blank what he uses? I mean, wouldn't it be more convincing if Kyan said, "Dude, your skin looks so dry, you must be washing with soap"?)

I'm tellin' you. I think I'm starting to stumble onto some great big skin care product conspiracy here.